Darn if I haven’t tried to keep my mind in 1938 Italy today (setting for my current work-in-progress). But it’s awfully hard when Sarah Palin sets off the 4th of July fireworks early with her surprise resignation. This isn’t a news blog, but I just have to start a thread in case anyone else is out there having just as hard a time concentrating — and how about this for adding a more bookish twist? Share your best Palin-resignation metaphor (regardless of your political inclinations) and I’ll send the winner 10 new 49writers, moose-monogrammed pencils, already sharpened. It can be an original metaphor that you’ve coined or a good one you’ve read in print or online.
I just loved this one today by Shannyn Moore (blogger from Homer), at Huffington Post: “I have said Sarah Palin’s political ambition combined with her intellect is like putting a jet engine on a golf cart; lots of horse power and no steering capabilities. Today she proved it.”
Add your tasteful contributions via the comments box anytime this holiday weekend.
I'm sure you've heard this one already, but it's a good one, and it takes place in Texas (don't I get bonus points for that?)
While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75-year old Texas rancher who was injured while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to Sarah Palin and her bid to be a heartbeat away from being President.
The old rancher said, "Well, ya know, Palin is a post turtle."
Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was.
The old rancher said, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle."
The old rancher saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain.
"You know she didn't get up there by herself, she doesn't belong up there, she doesn't know what to do while she is up there, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put her up there to begin with."
Found another one:
"Her voice is like the screeching brakes on a car just before a spectacular collision."
Dave, I'd never heard the turtle story, believe it or not. If you see this, email me at lax@alaska.net for your pencils!
I heard two others yesterday. On NBC Nightly News, someone noted that watching Palin is like watching a moose on roller skates – it's not pretty but you can't help looking.
The second I heard on conservative talk radio last night, a national show. The host said, in all seriousness, that Palin is like Stephen King's Carrie. He said Tina Fey and Katie Couric will be sorry when they see the powers (he said he thought they might be supernatural, like Carrie's) that Palin would use to get back at them. He also said that the conservatives will prove that popular opinion is more important than public service or public office. (No, I'm not making this up.)
They just keep coming. From Carla, one of our readers: "My spouse noted that the correspondents named her top Sitting Duck in the country, and within twenty-four hours she added Lame Duck and Dead Duck. All by herself, the woman is one big box of quackers…"
The Peg Noonan piece in last Friday's Wall Street Journal had some wonderful addtions, including how Sarah couldn't manage depth even in a shallow pool like TV, and that for all her ranting about elitism, she is so much a confection of the conservative elite that she might as well be a bonbon.